Today and the past few were really good days. Yes I still cried, But I did a lot of laughing, smiling and leaving the house.
Today I went to see my husbands family. They have always made me feel welcome and wanted. It felt so good to be around them. We laughed a lot. Felt good. I made a promise to Nard that I would make sure I kept them a part of Lolo’s life, and I do plan on keeping it. Leaving hurt, I did not want to, It was one of those day I wish I lived closer.
Yesterday, I stayed home and did a fair share of crying, I was told that crying is good, so when I feel like I have to, I cry. I cannot dwell, There were so many happy years that do not even compare to the very short months of his illness. Heck even when he was sick, there were still lot of happy times. This is what I dwell on.
To my husbands Insurance company, HE DID NOT HAVE CANCER WHEN HE SIGNED AND BOUGHT HIS POLICY! Can you just pay??
I need a relaxer, my hair is a mess. I have set some goal for myself, here is the rough draft
1= Going to lose some weight, Not because I want someone new,or want to be more appealing, But for myself; I feel I am ready to take that step, stick to it and succeed.
2- Going to take better care of my self
3- Going to buy more stuff for me, Nard always fussed I NEVER took time to for my self, It was like pulling teeth for me to buy new clothes.
4- Be nicer to myself
Last, I created a memorial page in honor of my husband, Not for it to be sad, but to celebrate his life….