I am 40 years old, this blog will be about me my life, My life after the death of my husband. How I will build my life. How I will define myself after his death. And the whole process.
My husband passed away April 29, 2011, he was 49 years old. He had a very short battle with lung cancer. We were married for less than two years but he was the love of my life for a total of 13 years.
When he died that afternoon, part of me went with him. The week between his death and funeral was a complete fog, I do not remember anything that happened at all. The one thing I do remember was being hit with the fact that he was gone and not coming back. After I buried him, I went into a mode, of paperwork and phone calls. Dealing with insurance companies, Social security credit cards; a month went by very fast.
Now I am little over a month, this weekend I posted an ad to sell his riding lawn mower, Today someone is suppose to come by and look and buy it.
I know this NEEDS to be done.. But it is hard either way.
I am also doing somethings, my husband would be doing himself, Yesterday I programmed, and mounted a wireless keypad for the garage door. Now I could have programmed it, But mounting it; I would have let my husband do that. I felt so happy that I done it, But felt so sad he is not here to see it.
The hardest part of all of this, is that I am afraid. Very afraid of failing, losing my home and everything my husband worked so hard for.
But as everyone has said to me, I have to take it one day at a time.